The Ending Reconsidered*

The plan was always to be dead
Before I even hit sixty:
If bad luck and illness did not
Put me down, I’d do it myself.
This young heart is already scarred,
Every lover knew that. They knew
Not to believe that forever
Actually meant forever. Then—

You. I cannot say which moment
It was when I realized I could
Be old; one of those days, maybe,
When you spoke of a dark cabin,
Large dogs, used books. In this forest
You have unkilled me. Just know that.

*Some of my more emotionally invested readers (Hi, Mom!) have asked that I specify when what I'm writing is an assignment for my poetry workshop, and what the assignment is, so that you don't actually think I have, I don't know, witnessed a car crash after doing it in the back seat or divorced my husband, who happens to be a Greek god. So: this poem is an assignment. The assignment was to write a sonnet about death. Okay? Everyone? We clear? Good.


chris said...

thank you for that.
simplified to the point of being almost 'emo' (if i may) .. but perfect. i was recently launched into the journey of being unkilled by someone who, for the first time in my remembered life, made/makes me think of the word: future.

oddly enough, in terms of the photo seletion, when i think of mushrooms, i think of the end of human civilisation (the world as we know it).

Kate Horowitz said...

I'm pretty sure something can't be both emo and perfect. It can only be one or the other, and since this poem is not exactly the pinnacle of literary achievement...

I'm going to go sit in the corner and cry starry tears and shake my fist at the world, the cold, cold world, who can never understand how deep and meaningful I am. Also how long it takes to fix my hair this way.

Anonymous said...

I really love this poem a lot. I think my favorite line is "You have unkilled me. Just know that."

It's very much about love and it's adorable in all it's sadness. And as Cashelle said, since I'm smitten girl right now, I like this poem because it's my life.


Anonymous said...

Perhaps it is "perfectly emo"? :)

I'm not usually a fan of sonnets, but I really enjoyed this one. I think initially because (please don't hate me) it reminded me of the characters in Twilight-because it's the only thing I've been reading in the last 3 months.

I re-read it and found I liked it again because it reminded me of myself, or what I can hope for at the very least. In reading it now, I think I like this poem because of its universality. It can easily relate to many people without trying-which I find, as a reader, is difficult for writers.

My favorite part is:
I cannot say which moment
It was when I realized I could
Be old; one of those days, maybe,
When you spoke of a dark cabin,
Large dogs, used books.

and I'm pretty sure that's because I'm waiting for when I can feel the same way.


P said...

I don't even know what emo means. But whatever. What I wanted to say was, "Lord, that's good."

And that your word verification is "losted." As in, "I losted my mind when I read your poem."

Kate Horowitz said...

Emo, n. or adj. 1. A genre of music consisting primarily of privileged, young white men wailing about their daily torments. 2. The subculture of listeners of emo music; see also scene. 3. A sneering epithet used to label, and thus ridicule, any such listener or behavior ("They broke up four years ago, but he's still being all emo about it (i.e. crying, self-mutilating, spending long hours in front of the mirror.")

Adam Wishneusky said...

this one is particularly good, even though there are no girlscout cookies

Kate Horowitz said...

Adam, the Girl Scout cookies are implied. You have to just imagine that they're there, in the forest, with the dogs, who love cookies, because everyone loves cookies and dogs love everything.

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